For those of you that don’t know: I am an avid Star Trek fan. I am such a fan that I am loyal to the franchise. Please don’t talk to me about Star Wars or other Science Fiction, because I am usually not interested.
Anyway, In the Star Trek Universe, Vulcans have learned to to be completely logical and tame emotions. The problem is, they still do have strong emotions.
I feel emotions very strongly and I have been told that (for a male) I am in touch with them pretty well.
Until I am NOT
When something dramatic or dangerous happens I am stoic and emotionless. So much so that I need to pretend to feel so that I don’t upset those around me.
I was once called a sociopath in counseling because of my apparent lack of feeling.
yes, that’s how bad it is.
I’ve been doing work and I honestly thought I was Light-Years from where I was before.
Then something happened
Something fairly dramatic in my life just happened (I’m still working on it-I may tell you in the future)
I just slipped back into my old ways. I know that’s my defense mechanism.
I know this is unhealthy.
That night I tried to clear my thoughts and use my technique to try to get back to being myself, I wasn’t in the mood for anything. I just went to sleep.
The next morning I woke up and my body was sore. I felt pressure on my neck and It was hard to look up and to the left. I made a mental note to stop by one of my chiropractic friends’ office after work that day.
I felt disconnected and a bit “hung-over-like”
The day sucked. I didn’t feel good and I’m re-living the events over and over in my head. I knew I wasn’t giving my patients 100% of me, but I couldn’t.
After the day was done, headed home. Didn’t want to meet my buddy to get adjusted, because he might actually want to ask me what happened and I was not ready to talk to anyone about my feelings.
I got home and I knew I had to deal with this I laid down and tried to get into a meditative stage by breathing and clearing my mind. I can usually go pretty deep fairly easily because I’ve been doing this a while.
The feelings that came up were confusion, anger and rejection.
So in my meditative state I went in and tried to remain in each of those states until I felt them dissipate.
It was a marathon session. ALMOST THREE HOURS!
I was doing deep stuff. The mind doesn't like to be uncomfortable, so if you think about uncomfortable things it will try to distract you and send you down different paths. I stayed on it until I didn’t feel resistance anymore.
After I was done, I got up and my body felt looser and softer, and didn’t have the tight feeling in my chest anymore.
This was as my fellow chiropractors would say: “A subluxation above C1”
I would say that MOST of the issues that I see in my practice are these. I would say if we took the time to work through our issues, we would all be healthier and happier.
Love you all*,
-Dan
*except the guy that will threaten me with violence every time he gets one of these
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I was just diagnosed with ADHD. Some signs were there for years but it has escalated into pure chaos in my mind and my daily life. Therapist has put some perspective on why it has been hidden to me for so many years. I do extremely well in reactionary circumstances. I put out fires with calm and confidence. But daily maintenance and preventative stuff? Crippling. So I wait until something is urgent, then I shine. Everything else is a mess. I’m also reworking my idea of “rest” because even when I’m resting, I’m thinking about projects, rehashing plans, etc all while a million other things are flying through my head. Mental hyper activity. We are working on that now and have talked about similar breathing exercises to what you’re doing to see if I can clear my head even if it’s for 30 seconds. I will start medication next week to help calm my brain down from a chemistry standpoint point but then we have to train me to wield my new clearer mind. I feel better and am waking up with less panic attacks already just knowing there’s hope of getting me untangled.