Divorce May Be Good For You
I have a family practice where I see pretty much everything, from infants to the elderly, athletes to people with disabilities.
When someone gets good results, they always want their loved ones to benefit in the same way.
Husbands tell their wives, wives bring in their husbands...
I even had a guy bring both his wife and his girlfriend! On different days, of course.
So, sometimes we notice a little bit of drama here and there. When one of our couples divorces, someone usually gets custody of the chiropractor.
It's rare that I keep seeing both parties.
It's probably for the best, because there was this one time when a guy showed up with his new "friend" while the ex’s best friend was in the waiting area.
Well, it was like an episode of the "Jerry Springer Show" that day.
Let's get to the story:
This one guy I’d been working on started coming in more frequently, complaining of more pain, more aches, more everything.
I've been doing this for a while now, so I told him that when I see this, it's one of two things:
Either you are physically doing something to aggravate the issue,
Or you are under emotional stress.
He told me that he and his wife were having problems, and there was lots of drama.
Of course, I kept working on him. Sometimes I did some emotional work, but with men, I have to be very business-like when dealing with emotions because we don't like to deal with them.
Time passed, and they finally divorced.
He still comes in regularly, and I've noticed he has less pain and fewer issues. His visits are more like "wellness visits"; he seems in better spirits.
I thought I'd never see the ex-wife again, but she showed up today, and when I checked her, she's doing better than ever!
It got me thinking... these people are way better off divorced! They're not in constant fight-or-flight mode; I'm sure they are happier or will be. It's a positive all the way around.
I've been divorced twice. That's not something I'm proud of. I see both those divorces as failures.
I was 23 when I got married the first time. We were both super young and unprepared. We struggled for four years, and then she wanted out.
Not that I blame her; I was unhappy with myself, and my frustration and unhappiness bled into the relationship.
My second marriage lasted a lot longer than the first. After all we were older, ended up having 2 kids and I really, really tried.
I was just terrified of losing my girls. I even recall saying that I was willing to be miserable and unhappy just “for the kids”
The truth is once we separated, I probably spent more “quality time” with my daughters than I had before.
But here’s the thing in both marriages I would have willingly given up the chance to be happier with a clean end to the relationship in order to give it another shot.
At some point you just run out of shots.
I see elderly couples out at restaurants and they hardly say anything to each other. Is it because they know each other so well that they don’t need to speak, or is one of them silently praying the other one will drop dead so they will finally have a chance at happiness?
What I’m trying to say here is:
Maybe there is no hope for that relationship that you are giving CPR
Maybe it’s time to move on.
Live Long and Prosper. 🖖
Unlucid | The Intuitive Chiropractor | My Links Page
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